I am such a girl.

90's dance s2

Never

Got all the links to the songstowearpants too back catalogue.

Gosh darn it, this week just keeps getting better! I feel insanely happy and content.

And to top it all off I'm going to be all unsociable and dive into a book.

<3

Tell me

Aww sheet.

I don't even speak korean!

This is stuck in my head at the moment:



This is what was stuck in my head about one month ago:



There's that little bit of english, and the rest I can only mumble. So, so insanely catchy though -_-

Also, random side note: No facebook since Friday night. Because I can. And it's not like anyone notices. But I feel so much happier without it.

No one would pay for these thoughts

I learnt at some point that thoughts are just thoughts. They don't define you, they may not even be your real opinion and they are definitely rebuttable.

1) I need help. I still haven't learnt that procrastination has long term negative consequences >=(
2) I don't think about trust issues anymore. If people hurt me, they'll hurt me. I'll just learn not to answer their questions truthfully.
3) Most of my friends are reliable.
4) I'm not replying back to letters due to sheer laziness... and I don't care anymore.
5) Nathan Fillion in Castle is awesome.
6) I'm going to have fun learning to start conversations with people in creative ways.
7) I want to learn how to make mash ups.
8) Bouncing ideas and theories off my family is actually pretty fun. Time consuming, but fun.
9) I can't stand not talking to people. Holidays where I'm stuck at home ARE THE WORST.
10) I got a hair cut. I miss my hair, split ends and all.

Quick recap of holidays

7th: LADY. FUCKING. GAGA. And Semi-Precious Weapons. We (Pendragon + uni buddy, Morgan + GF) we definitely wet and excited for the amazing Miss Gaga. She is a being of pure energy on stage, drawing strength from the audience the amplifying it at least tenfold back to the audience. She gives everything into her performance, singing, dancing and just generally being awesome. Yeah. YEAH. IT WAS FUCKING AWESOME.

We also went to some jap restaurant for dinner. Morgan's GF eats a shitload. Even more than Pendragon. And that's saying something.

8th: First day back at work for me for this holiday, and coincidentally first day back for work guy. Since we hadn't spoken for about 6 weeks we were a leeeeeeeetle too friendly. And consequently our boss told us off x.x oops.

Apparently work guy is a casual dating slut because when he sees someone (regardless of gender) he hasn't talked to in a while, he goes with them for coffee/lunch/dinner/a movie or something similar that you would do on a casual date. I find this amusing. While we were having lunch, an older (fat) lady made suggesting eyebrow wiggles at him. BWAHAHAHA Even the memory of this amuses me. It did not amuse him.

I, on the other hand, am a people slut... according to Doormat. I can't go (so he says) for 5 minutes with saying hi to someone I know. I can't help it! I just like waving to people. And getting barred is just lip-smackingly delicious.

9th: Morgan's b'day at Bicentennial park. We got lost on the way there (because I was navigating D=), and we got lost on the way back (Because Pendragon was supposed to be navigating... but Cyan and I navigated instead)... then we got back on the right track after an emergency call to mum. Fun times

Fun quotes:
Jellybean: So around Homebush is DFO, the park, where they're having the Easter show and a cemetery right?
Me: *not quite paying attention* BOW CHIKA WOW WOW.
Jellybean + Cyan: WORST TIME TO SAY THAT EVER!!!!!!!!!11

*Pendragon straddling the back of a bench*
Us: Doesn't that hurt?
Pendragon: No it's ok! *points to crotch area* It's hollow!

So we chilled at the park... and climbed on the epic rope structure thing... while disapproving parents looked on ^^"

Then we went to Morgan's house. Awesome dude's twin did an EPIC HARDCORE shuffle to a techno song, and Morgan (like Jellybean a long long time ago) experienced a split second moment of pure regret in midair during a jump into his backyard pool sometime at night. People kept stealing Cookies' Strongbow (or rather awesome dude's twin's Strongbow).

12th: work + stuffed up with time management

13th: work + pwned a student

14th: work + stuffed up again + getting advice/being told off.

Well I got advice about how to teach better.

And then my boss somehow segued into telling me in a really round-about way not to be too friendly with people at work. Well she told me flat out that if a co-worker wants to touch me I should say no. HAHAHAHA out of context that sounds so wrong. She made a hugging gesture at that point, not a grabbing bum kind of gesture.

Anyway, that's my recap. I've been making money yes, but I haven't studied. I am in trouble. I shall start today. Promise.

Reasons why fridays are awesome, and weekends are not

1) On fridays, you catch the bus home with chivalrous-bus-guy.

I actually talked to him today. He's a friend of a friend, and I snagged an introduction. He plays in a band as the bassist/keyboardist. He is half-asian (and by extension ridiculously cute) and does environmental management.

Wait, wait, wait: awesome guy checklist ==>

[x] Musical
[x] funny
[x] uses brain for processes more complex than motor function
[?] open minded
[x] tolerant
[?] attentive
[?] emotional depth
[x] courageous

Well 5/8 is pretty decent, hahaha but I digress

Did I mention he's chivalrous? He gave up his seat under the bus shelter so I wouldn't have to stand in the rain. Aww.

And we catch the same bus regularly ^_______^

But speaking of bus guys, I remember at schoolies I was asked who I liked. I actually lied and made up a story about how I liked this cute guy I met on the bus. Well, heck.

And speaking of bus guys, I have not seen scooter/slogan guy around in ages. It probably does not help that I am no longer running in an election, nor do I take Ancient history. I am more interested in slogan guy's slogans than I am of slogan guy... it piques my curiousity you see =]

2) I've been banned from going out this weekend

Not in those words exactly but dad said: I don't want to control your life but...

There's always that but.

This means I can go watch our very own Piano Prodigy at his Fmus performance, nor will I be going to any birthday parties.

3) It's raining today

Rain makes everything better.

4) You go to work, and your boss offers you more interesting work

On Monday I get to edit their proposed 4u/extension 2 booklet. This is more interesting work than 5/6 G.A./maths trial papers. Abstract math ftw!

Ah look at me, getting all excited about numbers. I'm weird like that.

5) Your cheque will clear in 3 business days

I.e. today! I have a pretty healthy amount of dosh to save up now. Thailand 2010 here I come!

Okay. I lied. Weekends don't suck that much. I have more time to do stuff.

Anyhoo, back to work.

Leave it to Meme: Hehe

The "Leave It to Meme" Meme: http://sundaystealing.blogspot.com/2009/07/leave-it-to-meme-meme.html

Today we ripped this meme off a blogger known as Kyddryn from Shadow and Sweetwater. She claims she stole it from someone on Facebook. But, it was probably stolen there as well. So, of course, that will be as far as we go. Tracing back our theft's thieves might take some time. Link back to us at Sunday Stealing!

Cheers to all us thieves!

Sunday Stealing: The "Leave It to Meme" Meme

1. Who was your FIRST date?

Lief. Although technically it was a while after we started 'going out' before we both actually had our first (ever) date.

2. Do you still talk to your FIRST love?

Well, music talks to me all the time... but I'd look like a crazy person if I ever tried to talk back =P Well that's what my imaginary friends tell me anyway =/

3. What was your FIRST alcoholic drink?

Passion pop! Or something like that, I don't exactly remember the name of it. My memory's not so good =/ I think I was in year 4 (about 10 years old), and I went to my best friend's house and they let me try it ^^ Alcoholics start young. Mmm alcohol...

4. What was your FIRST job?

Shop assistant in my parents' bakery. My first paying job was at my cousin's watch kiosk. My first, legally documented job is at a tutoring/coaching college =]

5. What was your FIRST car?

I don't actually own a car, or have a full licence. But, I learnt how to drive in my dad's station wagon, and now I drive both my mum's Aurion and my dad's car... into the kerb, scaring my entire family in the process... I'm not such a great driver D=

6. Where did you go on your FIRST ride on an airplane?

I went to Thailand with my parents when I was 2.5 I don't remember a great deal of it.

7. Who was your FIRST best friend & do you still talk?

My first best friend (according to my parents) is Yve. I talk to her occasionally, because we're both very busy studying Law ^^

The first best friend I remember is Ange. We stuck together from year 2 to year 5 then she and her entire family disappeared off the face of the planet. Well, not literally. I have no idea what's happened to her.

8. Whose wedding did you attend the FIRST time?

I first attended the wedding of my cousins. I have a lot of those. Cousins I mean, not weddings... I was asked to sing two songs, in languages I didn't understand =D

9. Tell us about your FIRST roommate.

I've never had a roommate... unless you mean my younger brother? Our old house was pretty small, and we actually had to sleep in the same bed. He kicks in his sleep ><

10. If you had one wish, what would it be (other than more wishes)?

I'd wish to be able to communicate and understand all languages. I think I've always wished for that.

Then I'd pretend that I didn't understand and use my skill to get discounts at asian grocery stores in Cabramatta xD

11. What is something you would learn if you had the chance?

More languages. I love talking, so how much more fun would it be to talk in a few more tongues? =D

12. Did you marry the FIRST person you were in love with?

No. Unfortunately the first person I fell in love with didn't love me back... I'm pretty sure he thought that I hated him =/ It's rather unfortunate that even back when I was 10 I was a witty, sarcastic little munchkin.

13. What were the first lessons you ever took and why?

Um... besides school, I guess my first lessons were Chinese lessons, because I thought it might be fun... and my parents thought it'd be a good idea.

Then I got lazy, after the 2nd lesson and didn't go ever again. Fail.

14. What is the first thing you do when you get home?

Take off my shoes at the door. Why, what do you do?

The heretic meme

Today we ripped this meme off a blogger known as Arnab Chakreborty from the blog The Heretic. He does not say where he got it from. But, it was probably stolen there as well. So, of course, that will be as far as we go. Tracing back our theft's thieves might take some time. Link back to us at Sunday Stealing!

Cheers to all us thieves!

http://sundaystealing.blogspot.com/2009/07/heretic-meme.html

1. Who was the last person of the opposite sex you lay in a bed with? Barney-wannabe. lol

2. Where was the last place you went out to eat? A Mediterranean restaurant in Parra... don't remember the name though. I had a really nice seafood paella

3. What was the last alcoholic beverage you consumed? A strongbow, and before that vodka + lemon lime bitters, and before that vodka + apple juice

4. Which do you prefer - eyes or lips? eyes

5. Medicine, fine arts, or law? Law ftw haha

6. Best kind of pizza? homemade, with a focaccia base, and copious amounts of olives.

7. What is in store for your future? another 4.5 years of law, hopefully an internship in a law firm, many glorious years as a prosecutor/criminologist/solicitor then a few years doing pro bono work, then retirement, in which I will travel the world.

8. Who was the last band you saw live? The various junior/senior/performance bands at my old highschool's music night =]

9. Do you take care of your friends while they are sick? Er... I guess if they were living with me I would, but most of my friends live pretty far away from me... and sometimes they don't want my help.

10. How many songs are on your iPod? 8769 songs exactly

11. Where is the last place you drove to? the local shopping centre

12. Where did your last kiss take place? in a beach house

13. What were you doing at 11:59 PM on Monday night? sleeping in my bed. heh.

14. Are you a quitter? No. I actually pretty stubborn. But I'm not stupid. If it's not worth pursuing, I won't fight for it.

15. Who was the last person you had in your house? a few of twiggy's and the other one's friends.

15. What do you think about people who party a lot? I'd probably respect them if they manage to work as much as they party. Otherwise, I'd think they were a bit foolish.

16. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable? Hell no. I revel in talking about to make other people uncomfortable though. hehe

17. What was the last CD you purchased? technically, i didn't pay for it per se, but rising sand by robert plant and alison krauss... but i'll say it was included in the entrance fee for supanova.

18. What are two bands or singers that you will always love? I think Utada Hikaru and The Beatles

19. Which of the seven deadly sins are you guilty of? All of them except greed. But not to an excess

20. How is your last ex doing? Fine, I guess.

Finish the sentence meme

Cheers to all us thieves!

Sunday Stealing: The Finish The Sentence Meme: http://sundaystealing.blogspot.com/2009/06/finish-sentence-meme.html

1. I've come to realize that my last kiss... gave me the strength to focus on my education, and not on my next relationship.

2. I am listening to... Iron Maiden.

3. I talk... a lot.

4. I love... my family.

5. My best friend/s... is awesome.

6. My first real kiss... was not that great. Actually it was pretty gross. Actually, it put me off of kissing for a month.

7. Love is... a lot of things. A blog's worth of things. It can't be defined in a sentence.

8. Marriage is... great for some people, but probably not for me.

9. Somewhere, someone is thinking... of themselves, probably.

10. I'll always... be really short.

11. The last time I really cried was because... a stupid, stupid mistake was made.

12. My cell phone... is a brick that has lasted quite some time. =]

13. When I wake up in the morning... I usually stay in bed for another few minutes.

14. Before I go to bed... I brush my teeth. Or check Facebook =/

15. Right now I am thinking about... John Mayer. Well a particular song anyway.

16. Babies are... cute I guess.

17. I get on Myspace... NEVER. MySpace is the cesspool of the internet.

18. Today I... drove to Cabramatta =S

19. Tomorrow I will be... working! Then crossing off some things from my 100 things to do before I die list.

20. I really want to be... an agent of global change. Someday.

I have to be a little more careful about what I say in this blog...

Dr. Horrible - The Musical is on in 5 days! Unfortunately, so is my Law assignment.

Hello blog which has not seen the light of day in a while.

I find it incredibly amusing that out of my siblings, I am the only one who is not having love-problems.

Heh.

Feels good to be different for a change. It's very refreshing to not be obsessed with whoever happens to the the boy of my year.

So. Work. Onwards!

It's plain to see the evil inside of me is on the rise...

Hmm... turned down a part in a play because it clashes with Animania... which I've already paid for... and even though I know Animania won't be all that awesome, I'd rather spend a day with my highschool friends than with people I barely know at uni... so sue me. Plus it clashes with M's birthday... and the director is scary... and the play is kind of cliched (but awesome) and the afterparty would have been fun too... but >_> doesn't matter la.

Hopefully I'll get into the Dr Horrible musical though. I watched that yesterday, and it is totally legen... wait for it.... dary! Legendary! Neil Patrick Harris is an amazing singer and actor. I bet he breaks hearts everytime people find out he's gay. *crosses fingers*



I haven't done anything so evil recently... but I still have foot in mouth disease -_- it's not so bad if I don't talk.... or drink... or have caffeine... stupid drugs....

None of us were angels...

Three subheadings today, instead of numbered, scattered points.

1. Projected self image

I found my Johari/Nohari windows again recently.

4 people think that I'm able, brave, caring, cheerful, dependable, dignified, energetic, helpful, ingenious, kind, loving, modest, powerful, reflective, sensible, trustworthy, warm and witty.

The same 4 people also think that I can be intolerant, insecure, withdrawn, hostile, unhelpful, cruel, ignorant, irrational, imperceptive, chaotic, embarrassed, loud, panicky, dispassionate, inattentive.

Most of the time, people I know are too nice to point out my negative characteristics. The only people I know that point out my negative traits are my close friends and family. And I value them for it, because they are quite aware that I'm human, and that I'm fallible.

I find it disconcerting when people idealise me or express romantic interest. Because I know that they're overlooking the negative traits that I have that I know would definitely make them run 100 kilometres in the other direction if they actually figured out that I can be quite... well not as perfect as they thought.

That's why I run 100 kilometres in the opposite direction when people view me in such a distorted light. Because they're so very, very incorrect in their perceptions of who I am, and I usually I don't want to prove them wrong. For a while now, I've been humouring people who are like that. Which is wrong, because I hate lying to them and pretending to be something I'm not.

2. Yes Man

I watched Jim Carrey's newest on Thursday with a bunch of friends who weren't a) overseas, b) at the beach, c) on bible camp. It was funny in a slapstick way I think... Carrey's humour has become less... sharp (?) over the years... some moments in the film that were supposed to be funny fell flat... some bits were kind of disturbing... but overall it was quite entertaining.

The message I got out of this film was that you shouldn't be afraid to grab life by the wrists and run. That letting yourself do the things you want to do is as straightforward as just saying yes.

I wish I could live that kind of life... but if I did that at this current moment it would hurt my parents. Because they wouldn't understand, and they'll think I'm frivolously wasting my life.

3. Nana

I started reading the manga, and I've watched the live-action film (courtesy of Youtube ^^). It's a shoujo manga, so it pretty much falls under all the conventions of the genre (ext 1 english... yay... how i love thee), so don't look for anything new. I haven't watched much of the anime yet.



The music from the live-action is what drew me into the series. The songs from both Nana (feat. Mika Nakashima) and Reira (feat. Yuna Ito) released accompanying the film are quite good. The only one I don't really like is "My medicine" by Nana, because it just sounds weird after the verses. Other than Glamourous Sky, Isolation is a pretty good song, which is surpising that 3/4 of the tracks are fairly strong.

hmm... it's late... bed time...

Conclusions on 2008, Resolutions for 2009 and general musings.

1) People judge you on your deeds, not your thoughts. You could be very well meaning, and do a heap of things that are strangely hurtful, and people would think you're awful. On the same token, you could be an evil git, and do a lot of altruistic things and people would think you're nice.

2) I am not an awful person. Sure, I do some exceeding stupid things, but I don't do them because I'm horrible, I do them because I don't think.

3) Said exceedingly stupid thing: Talking to Doraemon (named thus because of oddly round head), about Lief, and telling him pretty much everything. Now at the time I did this, I did not think that I should stop, nor did I think that I was doing anything wrong. In fact, it felt really good to have an outsider's point of view on everything. It's just unfortunate that he happens to be Lief's mortal enemy, and that everyone else in the room heard too. Now that was the stupid part that was really really dumb and will come back to bite me in the ass.

3) I do manipulate people to get what I want. That is probably wrong, but that doesn't actually stop me from doing it.

4) Like I said, I'm not actually an awful person, despite me going on about how evil I am. I actually say that I'm evil so that when I do something wrong, I can say "I told you so. You just didn't believe me." Also, after I've done something wrong that only I've noticed, I tell myself that I'm awful so that I don't actually have to do anything to fix the problem. It eases the guilt. I have a great logic centre.

5) I used to talk to Lief all the time. He was my deposit box for crazy talk. In fact he was pretty much the only person I could talk to about sex, love, and criminal behaviour completely without any discomfort, or fear of being judged. But now I've stopped talking to him, because he pushed me too far, and I haven't closed the gap between us.

In fact, I think the further the distance between myself and Lief, the better. Because I don't have the strength to deal with him anymore. So when he calls me, I lie, I omit facts, I don't tell him everything. He thinks that I'm drifting away from him, and he'd be right.

So now I don't have anyone to talk to about everything to. So I blog. And even then, I don't say everything in the one blog. I have a few dirty socks strewn all around the corners of the internet. I'm sure if you could be bothered, you could dig around and find out all the crazy things I think and feel, but then you'd be just as crazy as I am. It's probably not quite right to pour my heart and soul into an electronic journal, but I find it easier to express myself in written text, where I can edit my words, a lot easier than calling someone up, and thinking of things to say on the spot.

6) I have put on weight. And much that I hate to say it, this fact is draining my confidence. I used to like the way I look, but now all I can see in the mirror are tuck-shop-lady arms, a belly large enough to warrant questions about the due date of my baby, and my gelatinous thighs. There are some days when I feel ok about myself (particularly before I've eaten anything at all). I actually spend an hour trying to find clothes to wear everyday that don't make me look like a beached whale.

7) I don't blog for sympathy, or compliments. I was never given sympathy as a child, and I don't want or need it now. I don't want compliments, unless I've actually done something to deserve it. And these days, I don't feel like I deserve any compliments.

8) I'm not doing a very good job of behaving like an adult. You know, analytical thinking before making decisions, diplomacy, compromise that sort of thing. I am getting better at cooking a cleaning. I can do the dishes in less than half and hour now. =/

New Year's Resolution 1: Think before doing things.
New Year's Resolution 2: Think before saying things.
New Year's Resolution 3: Stop manipulating people.
New Year's Resolution 4: If I do something awful, and I feel guilty, I should do something to fix it, or deal with the consequences. If I've done something awful, and I don't care, then I should just forget it.
New Year's Resolution 5: Learn how to be less socially retarded in general.
New Year's Resolution 6: Eat less junk food, and have less soft drinks. Try to avoid Burger franchises.
New Year's Resolution 7: Take better care of my skin
New Year's Resolution 8: Exercise regularly.
New Year's Resolution 9: Be able to skim a kilometre.
New Year's Resolution 10: Save up $10, 000

So here's to the New Year. I hope that each year will be better than the last. And it should be. I can legally drink, have gay sex (not that I'm into that thing, and not that I'm a man that is gay and would be looking to have gay sex), go clubbing, visit pubs, visit casinos, buy lottery tickets, gamble (gambling is grotty, and addiction to it is likely to be hereditary), smoke (not that I would smoke. Smoking is also grotty, and I'd probably die while doing it), and become a registered member of certain rock climbing venues. Here's to being lucky in love, finding the path I want to take career wise, and starting up my hobbies of singing, dancing and general artsy stuff.

With brown cocoa skin and curly black hair

So I've now watched both the Priscilla queen of the desert stage production, and the film. I must say that the musical was much more fun, and less disturbing than the film. It was quite a lot of fun forcing Pendragon to watch it xD he's publicly homophobic, but we all know he loves it. Heh.

Random thoughts accumulated from the past few days

1) Lief needs help. He probably has stopped taking his antidepressants.
2) I can't trust M. I still love her, and have fun with her, but I can't trust her anymore.
3) Most of my friends are unreliable.
4) I'm not replying back to letters due to sheer laziness... and I don't care anymore.
5) BarneyStinson is pretty awesome.
6) I don't want to be open with people anymore. I used to tell everyone various things, and now I don't want to tell anyone anything.
7) I want to make more music.
8) My family can't act as my confidant.
9) I can't stand to talk to Lief anymore. He saps my strength.
10) I'm losing Lief. But maybe I should be letting go anyway.
11) I have no one to talk to about this.
12)

Jamming

I went over to Wren's house today for a jamming session. Wren, M, Cyan, Barney Stinson, Ania, and myself made sweet, sweet music =D It was really fun. We'd talk randomly, and then broke into song for 2o minutes. I remember doing Viva La Vida - Coldplay, Everything - Lifehouse, Runaway - The Corrs, Four chord song tribute, Don't say you love me - M2M, Beautiful - Pete Murray, Fluorescent Adolescent - Arctic Monkeys, The Tetris theme, The Final fantasy fight scene theme, simple and clean - Utada Hikaru, Semi-Charmed Life - Third eye Blind, Love song - Amiel, Don't panic - Coldplay, Misery Business - Paramore, and a lot of random stuff... Music makes me so happy. Even if I'm in a really bad mood, singing or listening to music will generally make me feel better. =]